So apparently, without my knowing it, I have been having an ongoing conversation with my feet for most of the summer. And it looks like it’s been going something like this.
Me: Yay it’s summer! I get to enjoy nice weather and cool breezes and soft grass!
My Feet: Mmm, yeah, walking in the soft grass, that is nice.
Me: And I can try to get back into jogging again!
My Feet: Hmm….okay, that’s new, but you have good sneakers for that with really good arch support and you’re taking it easy, we can go with this.
Me: And I can wear cute sandals to work instead of those boring stuffy old shoes!
My Feet: Uh…okay, the arches on these sandals aren’t great, but…eh, you sit down at work, I…guess we’re good?
Me: And I’m going to try hiking in the Catskills with a twisted ankle!
My Feet: ….Okay, we’re….not thrilled about this.
Me: And then climb a thousand-foot rockface!
My Feet: Yeah, that…that kind of isn’t helping either.
Me: And I’ll go for walks on the weekends in those beat-up mules because it’s summer and who cares what my feet look like – I’m exploring! Whee!
My Feet: Um. Okay, uh, see, these beat-up mules have this one patch that’s worn down to the foam rubber, could you maybe…not be doing this?
Me: And then I’ll go to Paris and bring nothing but sandals!
My Feet: This is getting kinda serious, here.
Me: And I’ll walk everywhere there too!
My Feet: Okay, come on, could you –
Me: Like the full 5 kilometers of the Promenade Plantee!
My Feet: Oh jeez. Okay –
Me: Oh, whee, I found these even cuter sandals in the back of my closet!
My Feet: What the – okay, those sandals have no arches at all, what are you –
Me: Yay, more shoes that I can wear to work without having to wear smelly old socks!
My Feet: Okay, see, here’s the thing about socks, okay? They’re soft, and –
Me: And then I’ll start walking home from the subway because it’s pretty and whee! Exercise!
My Feet: Oh good God.
Me: Oh, look – it’s August. I’ll be in Yosemite in a month – time to start planning the long distance hiking I’ll do! Yay!!!
My Feet: (silence, then one toe holds up a tiny sign reading “UNION”)
So. I admit I partly brought this on myself. But in the course of one night, my feet suddenly sprouted all of the following things at the same time –
- A callous on each heel
- Two callouses on each side of the balls of each of my feet
- Another callous on the bottom of my left big toe
- A blister on the back of one heel
- A blister on the bottoms of the fourth and fifth toes of my right foot
- A blister between the second and third toes on my left foot
- A blister on top of the third toe on my right foot
- An ingrown toenail just next to that blister
- Two more ingrown toenails
- A bunion
….So – today’s August Break photo prompt was “Red”. And – at this moment, the reddest things in my life right now are my feet. And I suspect no one wants to see a picture of this, so….I’ll spare you all.